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How to Bribe the Police in a Foreign Country

I was in a foreign country with someone who had just gotten us in a jam. I could have killed this person for doing something stupid because I was now standing in front of two police officers.

HAAKSBERGEN, NETHERLANDS - JUNE 09: Two policemen and a policewoman are talking with each other during a massive traffic control, june 09, 2011 in the Netherlands


After a bit of talking, one of them started to grab me and tell me he was taking me down to the police station.



Needless to say, going to jail in a foreign country is pretty much the last place you want to be. Thankfully, by doing exactly what I’m about to share with you, I was able to get out of the jam and leave the area even though my wallet was $50 lighter.



Before I continue, I want to make it clear that I’m talking about using bribery only in dire circumstances. I would never condone bribing the police here in the U.S. because things will not end well for you and you will likely go to jail.



However, if you’re in Mexico and you have to bribe the police in order to keep yourself out of a Mexican prison then I’m all for it in order to keep you safe.


The scenarios where you may have to bribe the police overseas can vary. Maybe you get pulled over for a moving violation or maybe the police see that you’re an American and they simply want to hassle you because they’re corrupt cops. Whatever situation you find yourself in, here is the “right” way to bribe the police.



First, you would never say something like, “Officer, what’s it going to cost me to get out of this?” You would also never whip out a huge wad of cash and start peeling back bills while looking at the officer.



Even though the police are corrupt, they’ll still be royally ticked off if you make it clear you are trying to bribe them. Instead, what you want to do is play the dumb and apologetic American.



You want to apologize over and over for your mistake and be as nice as you can be about it. Then, (and these are the key words to use) you want to say to the police officer, “I’m so sorry and I’m sure there is a fine I have to pay for this, how do I go about paying it?”



This is exactly what I did in the situation I mentioned above and the police officer said there was a $50 fine and I could just take care of it with him. (Little did he know, I would have paid a heck of a lot more than that to get out of there.) I handed the officer $50 and was able to go on my way.


The good news is, even if the police officer won’t take any cash from you it won’t appear as if you’re trying to bribe him. If you ask him if there’s a fine to pay and he says yes and tells you that you have to go to the court house (or somewhere else) then at least you know you have to pay a fine and how to pay it.



Hopefully, you never find yourself overseas in a situation that requires you to “pay a fine” but if you do, you now know what to say to get you on your way and keep you out of any foreign jails.


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